Heather Anne St.Aubin-Stout passed away on Monday, July 6, 2020 from metastatic breast cancer. Heather died at home in Charlotte, North Carolina, with her husband, Gray Stout, and sister, Amy St.Aubin, by her side. Heather was 56 years old.
Heather was born on August 1, 1963, in Royal Oak, Michigan to Lawrence and Linda St.Aubin. She spent her formative years in Michigan, surrounded by a loving extended family, whom she was close to her entire life. Heather was the eldest of 3 girls, and as a child she always put on plays (she was the director) and she loved to play school (she was the teacher). Heather was an avid reader and kept up the reading habit her whole life. She was also an animal lover from a young age, and had many beloved pets over the years, with a special affinity for birds when she was young. In 1976 the St.Aubin’s moved to Vermont. In 1977 they settled in Pennsylvania, where Heather spent her adolescence. She was a cross country runner and excelled at the sport, setting high school records that weren’t broken for years. She graduated from Southern Lehigh High School in Center Valley, PA in 1981.
Faith was always an important part of Heather’s life, she was a lifelong Catholic. She chose to attend Catholic University of America in Washington DC, where she earned a Bachelor of Science in Architecture, graduating in 1985. Heather loved living in the vibrant city of Washington DC, so much so that years later, after she and Gray were married, she returned and lived for 2 years in Alexandria, VA.
After graduation, Heather moved to Charlotte, North Carolina, following her parents and sister, Deanna, who had moved there in 1984. That is where Heather met the love of her life, Gray Stout. Both were young, intern architects at the time. They were married in Charlotte in 1987 at St. Peter Catholic Church nd were married for 32 years until Heather’s passing. Heather loved to travel and visited many exotic locales all around the world with Gray, their sons and extended family.
Heather and Gray lived in Salisbury, NC for 23 years and had 3 sons whom Heather loved dearly, Ryan, Nathaniel (Nate), and Nicholas (Nick). When the boys were young, Heather stayed home to raise them, all while volunteering for various community organizations and Sacred Heart Catholic Church and School, and working with Gray at Stout Studio Architecture. When her sons got older, she did many other things in addition to working with Gray in the studio. Heather was a very approachable, warm, friendly and open person, and these traits served her well when she later worked in the hospitality industry, running rental properties that she and Gray owned, working as a restaurant manager, and working with her sister, Deanna, as a pet sitter.
In October of 2006, Heather was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. After a lumpectomy, the cancer would return a year later. So began her personal journey with breast cancer, which she documented in her book, Not My Mother’s Journey. The book was about her experience of being diagnosed, battling, then living with breast cancer, with the spectre of her own mother’s death from the same disease spurring her on. Heather did book tours, and had many speaking engagements at cancer benefits throughout the past 13 years. She helped many women cope with their breast cancer diagnoses and treatment.
Heather St.Aubin-Stout was a woman who lived her life with grace and strength. She is deeply missed by all who knew her. She was a beloved daughter, sister, wife, mother and aunt. She is survived by her husband, Gray Stout, of Charlotte, NC, her sons, Ryan Stout (daughter in law Hannah Stout), Nate Stout, and Nick Stout, all of Charlotte, NC, her father, Larry St.Aubin, of Keego Harbor, MI, her sister, Amy St.Aubin (brother in law Stan Gardner), of Charlotte, NC, her sister Deanna St.Aubin-Bridgwood (brother in law Mark Bridgwood), of Charlotte, NC, half brother Kyle St.Aubin of Bloomfield Hills, MI, half sister, Vic St.Aubin, of Detroit, MI, nephew Jay Stout of Wilmington, NC, nephew Jess St.Aubin of Charlotte, NC, niece Lindsay Gardner, of Charlotte NC, niece Astrid Bridgwood of Charlotte, NC, nephew Finnan Bridgwood of Charlotte, NC, and in laws Pete and Millie Stout, of Salisbury, NC and brother in law Jeff Stout (sister in law Beth Stout) of Salisbury, NC. Heather’s mother, Linda Marie Baerwalde St.Aubin, predeceased Heather in 1987.
Funeral services for Heather will be Friday, July 10, 2020, at St. Gabriel Catholic Church in Charlotte, NC. It is an intimate family only service due to the current pandemic. Heather’s final resting place will be in the beautiful Carolina Memorial Sanctuary in Mills River NC. Burial will be Saturday, July 11, 2020
In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the Triple Negative Breast Cancer Foundation via the Facebook link:
Or to Carolina Memorial Sanctuary:
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